“Amber?”

My name barely reached my ears. I hadn’t been paying attention to the lesson up to now, so I had no idea what the question was. Flustered, I stuttered. “umm… I don’t know?” I replied sheepishly. The older male’s lips set into a tight line as he glared over his glasses.

“No I don’t know is not the capital of Tennessee.” He said flatly, obviously annoyed. Nashville. Duh. I actually knew that answer, but my wandering thoughts had gotten me into trouble once again. A fellow student- Gabriel Walker- answered correctly, proud that he could get the teacher’s attention. I let my eyes stray to the clock. Five more minutes until I could go home. Hopefully my parents would still be at work. There was no doubt in my mind that they would be. They always took as much overtime as they could get, just so they wouldn’t have to be home with each other.

My mom had caught my father cheating on her, and our family has fallen apart since then.

They always fought over everything they could. Our house was like a volcano that always erupted. Not only was it destructive to itself, it hurt everything around it. Their fighting had the same effect. The only difference was that there wasn’t any lava or large rocks to crush anything. Their fighting had moved me into a depression, and I started to struggle in school because I couldn’t pay attention. My ‘friends’ had left me the moment my life began to change. My life was beginning to feel like the walls of Jericho after Joshua arrived.

There was only one person I knew that had stayed by my side throughout the entire time.

The bell rang and I was out of my seat before everyone else. I was able to get to my locker before most of the students left their classrooms. My best friend Ryan was coming home with me to help me with my homework. Normally, I wouldn’t be able to finish because my parents would start fighting again and I would break down crying and have to go to bed with my I pod with my music set as loud as possible to tune them out until I fell asleep.

“Hello Amber.”

Ryan was tall with black hair and glittering blue eyes. He was the most understanding person I had ever met, and the only person in the entire school-not counting the principal- who knew what was going on at home with my family. He was wearing a pair of jeans, a white shirt and a blue jacket along with his back pack slung over his shoulder. “What homework do you have?” I was behind in my classes, and the principal created a special class for me to catch up. I went to her for an hour during my normal English period because English was the only class that I had an A in.

“I have to study my state capitals.” I said as I ran my schedule through my head to try and remember everything I had been assigned. “I have a couple problems left in math since this week’s study is relatively easy, no science” Thank the lord “I need to study for Spanish, but you do too so that will help.” Ryan nodded in understanding while stuffed my planner into my backpack. “Oh, and Ms. Carter asked me to work on my story today.” The principal’s classes were incredibly easy. As long as I paid attention and studied for her weekly quizzes, her only homework was that I work on the novel I was writing for fun. She only checked my progress on my story every month or so, and I always tried to find time for at least one chapter by then. My Imagination was the only thing I could use to get away from the horrible world I was trapped in, so I loved to create my own world in my writing. Ms. Carter- and Ryan obviously- were to only people that understood that.

“Sounds simple.” Ryan said thoughtfully while I locked my locker. “Do you know when you’re family is coming home?”

“No.” I said. “I hope they never come home.”

If Ryan heard me, he didn’t say anything. He was the only one I ever said anything like that too, so he had heard comments close to that often. “Como te llama?” He asked slyly.

“Me llama Amber.” I replied. “Me gusta escribier y dragonas.” My name is Amber. I like writing and dragons. Our professor would ask us the same question as Ryan just had and we had to reply back with our name and two things we liked. That wasn’t the only thing I needed to know, but I was proud that I actually remembered something that I needed.

“Excelente.” He replied with a grin as we walked outside.

“Gracias.”

“Dinada.” My house wasn’t very far from the school, but Ryan quizzed me on different words I needed to know the entire way there. By the time we arrived, I could remember every color and describe a tall person with brown, red or blonde hair.

The house was, thankfully, silent. As expected, my mom and dad were still at work. Ryan and I plopped on the couch and he instantly pulled out his Spanish book to continue with the relentless quizzing.

“You’re getting better.” He said nearly an hour later with the biggest grin I had ever seen.

“Thank you great Master.” I giggled.

“You’re welcome young cricket.” He replied with a dorky impression of the old ninja masters we’ve seen on TV. “There is still much to learn, however.”

“Unfortunately.” I sighed.

He dropped his mocking act instantly and wrapped his arms around me. “Everything will be alright.” He whispered. I started to reply, but I heard a car pull into the driveway. “GO!” I hissed shoving him off the couch. Ryan stood instantly and fled to my room in order to hide in the closet. The doorbell echoed through the house and I raised an eyebrow. My parents would never ring the doorbell in order to get into their own house. I opened the door.

“Amber Chase?” The man was tall with gray hair, sunglasses and a black suit.

“Yes?” I said softly.

“My name is Drake.” The man said. “I’m afraid I have some bad news.”

OOOOOOOO

I couldn’t believe it. Nothing seemed real. I couldn’t stop crying, and Ryan had already changed into one of my father’s shirts since the other one had been too wet to wear anymore. He held me close, whispering words in my ear in an attempt to call me down, but nothing seemed to be working.

My dad had gone to pick up my mom for lunch in an attempt to make things right. They had been hit by a drunk driver on the way, and they were never coming back.

Many emotions spun through my mind, some of which I was ashamed of instantly. I was angry at them. Maybe if they wouldn’t have started fighting in the first place my dad wouldn’t have to make it up to mom! That was probably the stupidest emotion. I shouldn’t be mad at my parents for a mistake that they were trying to fix. At the same time, I was angry at myself. I thought that this was my fault. I should have done something to fix it. If I would have kept father home that night mom found him cheating, there never would have been any reason to fight.

Why should I be mad at myself? I hadn’t done anything wrong!

Have I?

Drake had left some time ago. He was searching for a new guardian for me, but I knew that he wouldn’t get very far. All of my grandparents had died sometime ago, and I didn’t even know any other relative.

“Everything will be okay.” Ryan said softly.

Was he crazy? Nothing was okay! My life was forever changed, and there was no way it could go back!

I couldn’t get angry at Ryan for any reason. He had stood by my side when my life came tumbling down. He had even called his parents so that he could stay with me for the night and make sure I was okay- something that my parents would have never agreed on. But they were no longer here, and I needed all the support I could get.

“What will happen?” I finally choked out.

Ryan was silent for a moment. I looked up into his eyes to search for any sign of what he was thinking.

“I can’t leave him.” I thought. I surprised myself. It was like someone else was placing their thoughts into my head. And yet, I knew it was true. Ryan was my best friend…

And I think I had fallen in love some time ago.

I looked away. I shouldn’t be thinking about love at a time like this! I should be thinking about what was going to happen to me next. But I couldn’t get him out of my life- the fact that he was cradling me probably didn’t help that much- but it was still true.

“I don’t know.” He said finally as he looked down into my eyes. “But I promise I won’t let you go.”

My eyes widened for a split second. Ryan didn’t want to lose me either?

It was shameful. It had taken my parents ultimate end for me to figure out Ryan’s feelings. I should have noticed them so long ago. He never left my side and he was more focused on me than himself. He had even ditched school once to keep me company when he caught wind of my depression reaching the suicide level.

He was the only person I felt safe around.

There was a knock at the door. Ryan jumped up before I did and swung the door open. “Hello?” it was Drake. I stood up and quickly wiped my eyes before joining Ryan at the door.

“Hi.” I said softly.

“We didn’t find anything.” He said before I could ask. “But… we have found a respectable foster family for you.”

My face fell and I glanced at Ryan. He didn’t even seem worried. Did he know something I didn’t. “When am I leaving?” I croaked while Ryan wrapped his arms around my waist.

“As soon as you’re packed.” Drake said. “The foster mother said she already knew you, so we’re going to move you into her home first, then take care of all the paperwork.”

I was at a loss for words, so I simply nodded and Ryan led me upstairs. “I’ll help you pack.” He said grabbing a suitcase out of my closet. He conveniently left the room while I packed my underclothes, and returned once I had buried under other clothes. “I promise everything will be alright.” He whispered after we had finished packing, wrapping his arms around my wais and pulling me close to his chest.

“How do you know?” I croaked.

Instead, he kissed me.

All my mixed emotions fled as I closed my eyes. For a few moments, it was just me and him. I deepened the kiss and I happily accepted his newfound confidence. He parted way too quickly for my tastes, but I didn’t say anything while he stared deeply into my eyes. “Because I know.” He replied with a sly smile. “I promise.”

He took my bags and carried them all down the stairs. I moved into each room in the house and found everything I wanted and shoved them in another suitcase. There wasn’t much, a couple pictures, blankets, a pillow and a few other things that were important to me. I glanced back at my room once more. I would probably never see it again. Tears came to my eyes, but I turned around and sulked down the stairs. I knew it would be hard, but I had to try and get over my parents death eventually.

It would be hard, but I always had Ryan.

He stepped outside with Drake following close behind. My foster moth had brown hair and a wide smile on her tanned face. I froze as my eyes widened, and a huge smile spread out on Ryan’s face.

“Hello Amber.” Ryan’s mother said. “I heard what happened. I promise to help you anyway I can.”

I was too stunned to answer, so Ryan slid to a spot in front of me and wrapped his arms around me once again.

“I know it’s hard to change so fast.” He murmured. “But I couldn’t risk losing you. So I called my mom and she called Drake minutes later.”

“That means you’re my…” I trailed off.

He chuckled. “Brother? Kind of.” He paused, deciding how to explain it. “We’re not actually related so this…” He kissed me delicately on the forehead. “Is still okay.”

“Oh… right.” He chuckled and lifted me into his arms. I had forgotten how strong he was, despite his looks.

“I told you that I wouldn’t let you go.” He murmured. “I’m going to help you get your life back together. Mom already called the school, and neither of us are going for the next week.”

“A lot of catching up to do.” I moaned lightly.

He laughed. “I’ll help you, Amber. I promise. I know you’ve gone through a tough time these past few years… and after tonight…” He trailed off knowing that I knew what he was thinking.

“Don’t leave me.” I said softly.

“I won’t.” He whispered, and then broke into a wide smile. “Mom has already given me permission to date you.”

I smiled. “I’m glad.”

I didn’t know what to think when he carried me to the car. My parents death… even with all of their useless fighting I still loved them. It would take awhile to get over it. Ryan wiped a dear from my eye and rested my head on his shoulder. I knew that something good did come out of it. I had Ryan now. He would help me through this.

He had become my light in the darkness. The one person who will remain with me, even with the sudden change in my life. He was the reason I could bare the pain of losing my family.

“Don’t worry.” He whispered again, kissing my forehead. “If you need to cry, go ahead. We all understand.”

“Thank you.” I whispered smiling through my new tears.

“You’re welcome.” He replied.

I cried myself to sleep in his arms, feeling safe for the first time in three years.

OOOOOOOO

The funeral was a week later. No one came except for Ryan, his parents, the Ms. Carter, and- of course- myself. It was a closed casket, thankfully, and only lasted a half an hour. I never left Ryan’s arms while they lowered my parents into their grave. I closed my eyes as the tears started to fall. “Do you need to leave?” Ryan whispered in concern.

I wanted to say no, but I knew that I couldn’t take it anymore. Ryan’s mother nodded instantly in understanding, and he helped me up. We turned and walked toward the exit of the graveyard. Ryan knew where I wanted to go. There was a small forest nearby where Ryan and I had created our own little, special area to go whenever we needed to be alone. His mom knew where we were going- even though she didn’t know the exact spot. It was a small, beautiful meadow in the middle of the forest filled with different colored flowers. It was covered by trees, giving it a nice balance of shadows and bright sunlight. Ryan led me to the middle and we both sat down, and I leaned into him like a life sized pillow. We sat in silence for some time. I was thinking about how much my life has changed. I hadn’t been to school in a week, but Ryan- despite his protest- had gone, bringing back as much of my work as he could. He became my tutor after that, but only long enough that I understood what was going on. His mother didn’t want me working too hard so early.

“Ryan.” I broke the silence he gave me his full attention instantly. “Have you ever felt like you could have changed the outcome or something?”

He thought for a moment, and I almost held my breath. He knew why I was asking. A piece of myself still told me that this entire thing could have been avoided if I would have done something different. Ryan was the only one that seemed to understand that- probably because I told him everything. “Yes.” He admitted finally. “Amber, why do you still feel like this is your fault.”

“I… I don’t know.” I looked away. “I know I didn’t start the long fight, but I remember them yelling at each other about my grades. I wonder if I would have kept my grades up, this would all be different.”

“You were under a lot of stress Amber.” He said softly. “You can’t blame yourself for that. You tried everything you could.”

“I know.” She sighed. “It’s stupid to think that my struggling in school would be the whole reason that my parents…” I couldn’t bring myself to say the last word.

“It’s not.” He promised. “Amber.” He reached into his jacket pocket. “I have something for you.” I turned around and sat criss-crossed in front of him. He handed me a small box wrapped in pink and blue stripped wrapping paper. Surprised, I tore the paper open and opened the box. Inside was a small necklace in the shape of half a heart handing on a thin silver chain. “Oh my…”

“I’ve got the other one.” He said softly holding out his own that was clipped around his neck. “It’s… my promise to you that I’ll always be there.”

I smiled. “Thank you.” I jumped forward and wrapped my arms around his neck. “I love you Ryan.”

“I love you too Amber.” He replied as he clipped the necklace around my neck. “Let’s go home.”